I’m now seventeen years old. About a year ago I had an abortion. I remember the day my mom noticed I didn’t get my period, and my heart dropped. We rushed out to get tests, and 5 out of 5 were positive. After that moment none of the choices seemed to be left to me. My boyfriend was 18 and starting college and work. I was in school and making a comeback from a messup the previous year. My parents called Planned Parenthood the next morning and made me make my appointment.

When I got there the protesters were enough to make me gag. I knew my choice from the beginning, but with everyone telling me I couldn’t do it, I felt overpowered and gave up. Three times they asked me, “Is this your choice? Are you being forced?” and for the fear of losing my family, I kept my mouth shut and nodded. The next thing I knew I was on a table, looking at a tube; and I saw my baby’s arm go through it.

It hit me then, there WAS a life inside of me. When I walked out I changed forever. I had the abortion because I didn’t want to lose my family, but now I’m keeping a huge secret thats killing me inside from all of my aunts, uncles, and cousins; and I feel more distant then ever. The bullying and slandering at school was unbearable. To this day I get weak when I see a baby or when I think what if. To this day I still want that baby. To this day I’m disgusted with myself. To this day I’m speaking out as much as possible to let teens know…don’t make a spur of the moment uninformed choice because it’s a one-time thing. It’s something you can never change and something you won’t forgive yourself for.


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